My daughter Isabelle is a little over 2 yrs old now and an amazing joy to us. Just recently she has been giving us trouble going down for naps. We have our routine of book reading and rocking before nap. But recently she has been singing and playing in her crib for extended periods (up to an hour!) before lying down to sleep. This frustrated me as I began to try and evaluate what I was doing wrong. I found out that when my Mother-in-law keeps her she doesn’t do this. I started to think…was I spending too much time with her prior to her nap? Was I putting her down too late?

I started being much stricter on getting her to nap in a timely manner. I cut short our sweet pre-nap cuddle routine. I talked with her about going straight to sleep. But to no avail…the playing continued, and I felt trapped every afternoon…praying and waiting on the nap to begin and uncertain if she would even sleep on some days. Of course then being frustrated with a grumpy toddler and soon to be grumpy husband as he arrived home to the tired Mommy and child.

It was clear something had to be done so at our GEMS® meeting I asked the most experienced and wise Mom I know if she had any thoughts on the matter. She simply said ” Have you gone in and established boundaries on what she is not allowed to do in her crib at nap?” Feeling a little silly I gave an excuse of why I felt like I hadn’t gone in and went home.

Upon discussion with my husband and further thinking I realized I was subconsciously paralyzed with fear of my toddler during naptime. Here’s why… many months ago whenever we went into her room if she woke early the nap would be over as she would not go back down. So we had informally established a “no entering” rule until we were ready for the nap to be over. I thought I was in control, but actually I had allowed too many freedoms and her crib funnel was too big.

For the past week we have set up boundaries of no singing or playing in her crib before napping. Then we have gone in when we see she is enjoying these freedoms again and verbally instructed her. She has responded well as we have pulled the funnel in again.

Here’s what I am learning…this parenting thing is ever changing as she grows and what was important before (not going in to her room until we say nap is over) is now an area she can respond to with verbal instruction. Is there an area in your parenting your child has outgrown?

That’s the beauty of being in this like minded community, I am almost embarrassed to say it but I really don’t think I would have thought of this on my own. This is my first try at parenting though…maybe I’ll remember next time!