“…the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” Galatians 5:22-23

I have read, memorized, and quoted the above verse numerous times throughout my life as a Christ-follower, however I must admit that I have always cringed inside when I hear the words “self-control”. It’s something I knew I should be working on, but I wasn’t sure how.

I distinctly remember a few years ago, and prior to having a child, talking with a Mom who I knew applied the Growing Kids God’s Way principles. She explained to me how her family’s routine was the best thing that had ever happened to them, and not just for her children. At the time I didn’t really understand what she meant.

Before Isabelle arrived, my husband and I would sleep in late on our days off, then scramble to get what we needed to accomplish done. We rarely led an active lifestyle, and I knew we needed to change. I felt trapped and no matter how hard I tried to follow a “schedule” I never stuck to it. To our friends and co-workers we had our act together, but in our free time we were just plain lazy.

I always had excuses- I worked full-time, volunteered at church, led a small group, so the laziness seemed like a non-moral issue. A grey area that was my choice on how I was to use MY free time.

Then Isabelle burst upon the scene, and I began to stay at home to raise her on most days. I remember as a new Mommy wondering if I would ever sleep in again! Soon I felt the laziness taking over more and more of my free time.

We took the Toddlerwise courses and I started working on goals and a routine for Isabelle. Now there was a little person who was looking to me to learn everything about life, and that was a huge motivation for me to change. Then a light bulb went off, here’s a very practical way I could work on my own self-control.

My husband and I set goals for ourselves including physical, spiritual, and educationally. I made myself a routine, and then incorporated it into our family routine.

In the past year, I have seen so much progress in my life. I am healthier, more active, studying the bible and cultivating my relationship with Jesus more now than in the past 10 years. We work more on our marriage and have even set aside special time to get more “connected” in the evenings. Because my housework is completed in a timely manner I don’t have to do it after my sweet baby goes to sleep.

Most of all I have very little guilt. I live in God’s freedom and peace when enjoying the down time that is purposely scheduled into my routine.

Now when I feel the laziness and procrastination, that lack of self-control creeping up, I can look at my routine and ask myself, “Do you want to accomplish your goals? and Do you have the freedom to do that now?” It helps me to push through and stay motivated.

As a side note, I make sure to include adequate time for rest and fun! Occasionally we have a “chuck the routine” family day when we have a little extra fun, and Mommy and Daddy take a nap, too.

I know I cannot teach my daughter self-control if she does not see it in me. Our flexible routine has opened my mind to practical ways that we can accomplish our goals and develop self-control.

If the idea of developing a routine seems overwhelming and restricting, start with small goals and chunks of time. You can do it and God will bless your efforts to train your entire family by using your time wisely.