“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up…A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 NIV

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” Proverbs 27:17 NLT

God’s Word repeatedly teaches us the value of true friendships and community, however I have noticed a theme in current parenting “pop culture” articles, one that pervades all humanity, but is especially difficult for Mommies. Competition. Seems we are all so desperate for one another’s approval we’ll do anything to get noticed, especially look down our noses on other Mommies.

You may have noticed that everyone deals with this differently. Some of our friends are amazing, they lend an ear and give wonderful unassuming advice. However, some Mommies become defensive and aren’t able to hold conversations about anything related to children. When I have experienced this it has made me sad that I don’t feel we are able to “sharpen” one another.

As Christ following Mommies working hard to daily train the next generation, one thing I know for certain, we need each other! Life is essentially about relationships, first with Jesus and then with others. Let’s put all the competitiveness aside and help one another.

The first step to supporting one another is beginning to truly love one another. Jesus teaches us “Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” John 13:35 When we know our friendships are based on Jesus love that helps us to relax and open up.

God has blessed me with all sorts of friends from varied walks of life. In my experience we need to have at least these 3 kinds of Mommy friends. Of course, all should be like minded to you and your parenting goals.

First you need a Mommy friend who is in the same life situation as you, similar age and number of children. This is your friend who sees you really doing life, and then makes the effort to tell you how awesome you are as a Mommy (even though she’s seen your less than pretty side too). She’s your sounding board, because you’re doing it all at the same time period you support each other during the difficult times. God was pretty cool to me when my next door neighbor had a baby girl just 4 weeks before me, and then to develop our friendship during our maternity leave that has become the most amazing encouragement.

Second you need a Mentor Mommy, someone who is a step or two ahead of you in life both spiritually and as a Mom. Ideally someone with more children than you, and who are older than yours. She’s your primary go to for the hard questions. This friend in my life has 5 children ages ranging 10 yrs to 1 yr old. The sweet part about her family is she has children of all temperaments and she has seen it all so nothing is a new problem to her.

Last you need a Mommy to mentor, one that is just a little behind you in life situation and with younger children. This relationship must be brought to you by God or they may not be receiving of advice. In my life this sweet friend has been so good to me. She makes me feel like I am the most amazing Mom, even though I always think I’ve given such simple ideas to her. In the same way I appreciate my Mentor, God has been able to use me to minister to another Mommy.

All of my Mom friends have either taken the GFI classes with or met through the local GFI community, and the love they have shown me truly lets me know they are following Christ in their parenting. Mommies everywhere, let’s unite to worship God in our friendships and parenting!